Friday, September 17, 2004.

What do you want?

"I'll speak to u online...i just didn't want to spoil the night who's weather i really like"

Why can't you just tell me why you said sorry?
You'll find out in due time...

I'm too busy *yet smsing someone along the way to your house* how do you think I'll feel?

In due time? In due time? In due time? Dun want to speak to me face to face cause it'll spoilt your mood of the night? How hurting it can go? Out of so many day and night, tonight is the worst of all... I really almost cried out infront of you... When I heard you said I'll find out in due time... Heart really shattered...

You're confuse... and you're making me even more confuse... If you're a lecturer, you are confuse of what you're teaching... and you are teaching a confuse student what to do... making him even more confuse of what he's doing...

Apple really doesn't have anything for me... She likes someone else in RJ... You asked me to take care of her... And I did... But yet you are jealous... I purposely made her my mei, so nothing else can go wrong with me and her... She's my mei, Full Stop! nothing else... Have I ever call you mei? I only said you're like my younger sister, but I nv call you mei...

if i have to stop hurting u, i'd would have to tell u to forget abt me... If forgetting you is that easy, then I'm a beast... You want me to give up, why? coz of apple? Apple is not a dustbin or a poor child that no one loves... you think what you doing is noble? willing to spare a nice man and give him to her?

I admit, when I drink, it's either I'm happy or I'm trying to escape from something for a period of time... which the period of time always limit to around 4 hours... that's when my kick is over, and the rashs came in... that keep me awake... good news is... the heat rashs time is shorter and shorter everytimes...

Why are you still hiding your emotions? I can see how happy you are when you first saw me at MRT. I saw your hidden smile out of the coldness... For that moment, I thou to myself, hey, things isn't that bad. She's just like normal woman... yes = no, no = yes, maybe = yes... But on the way back, the coldness gets into you again... I'm like talking to a wall... And I think... Am I stalking you? Am I irritating you?

I told Apple how I feel, coz you refuse to speak to me... That's why I hope she can help... I do know you'll get jealous... that's why if only on cases I feel it's hopeless, I'll ask her for help... I oso purposely let her knows... that I love you... so she won't develop any feeling for me... You're not the only person that is thinking... You can say... I think in a more tactical way bah... I dun plan or think of far future... Coz I think those things are too far to affect the current...

no matter how much i feel like smsing you... i'll not...
no matter how much i miss you... i'll still dun sms you
That's only if you want me to stop bothering you for a period of time... If you still choose to go on a cold front, in order not to get myself hurt more, I'll have no choice, but not to msg you too... but what I had being doing and still doing, is to believe that my sincerely can break your cold...


B0mb3r screamed @ 2:46 AM